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"The Path of Healing & Restoring;
For Those Who Are Grieving"

Lesson #1: The Five Emotions of Grieving Persons

Hello, I'm Bob Miller ND, a Natural Health practitioner that helps individuals build their health naturally.

Over the years, I noticed that stress from life challenges was seriously impacting the health, well being and peace of mind of my clients. I found that those individuals who were grieving from the loss of a loved one experienced a particularly high level of stress from the losses and life changes.

Clearly, losing a loved one may be one of the most difficult life challenges you have ever faced. Your emotions may be swirling in so many directions, it may be difficult to know what you are feeling, and don't know where and how you may find peace of mind.

To help my grieving clients, I partnered with a Hospital Chaplain, medical doctor, psychologist and a team of pastors to create a program that provides the spiritual and emotional support that persons who are grieving so often desperately need.

In these lessons, I'll share with you some concepts that may help you at this difficult time in your life. Hopefully, you may find some answers as to what you are feeling and how you can begin the path of healing and restoration.

In the seven e-mail lessons, you will learn:

  • The five emotions people typically experience in any life challenge, and usually more intensely with the loss of a loved one.
  • The order in which you typically experience these five emotions
  • The new thought processes you can learn that will put you on a path of healing and restoration.
  • The Three Easy to do Exercises that permanently teach you the new positive ways of thinking, so you can heal and restore.

Let's Begin Our Journey and Learn.......

The Five Emotions of a Life Challenge

First, I'd like you to understand what I call "The Anatomy of Stress", this being, understanding the underlying emotions we all experience in any stressful life circumstance and of course, more intensely and for longer periods of time with the loss of a loved one.

In any stressful life situation, we typically experience these five emotions but not always in this order;

Grieving and Feelings of Loss

Typically, the first feelings someone who loses a loved one are feelings of shock, grieving and loss. There may be many ways that you life is now missing something that they provided. I call this a sorrow. It may feel as though part of you is missing, and you are incomplete. There is a big hole in your life. In your next lesson, we will cover this subject in depth.

Sorrow Creates Fear

Often, this loss and sense of grieving turns into fear. There may be fears of the future, fears of your own well being, fears as to how you will cope, etc. In lesson #3, we will examine fears in greater detail.

Fear Creates Anger

After you experience fear, the next emotion is typically anger. Anger can be experienced in several ways. Typically we think of anger as someone who is bitter, cynical or acts angrily.

However, If the anger is towards yourself, you can experience it as;

  • Guilt
  • Shame or
  • Depressing thoughts
  • If you believe it is unacceptable or you just cannot show your anger, you may turn the anger inward as depression.

    • Self-Esteem is Lowered

    After the anger, our sense of self-esteem and self-worth is usually impacted in some way. In lesson #5 of this course, we will devote the entire session to how sorrow issues impact your self-worth and self-esteem.

    We Begin to Worry

    Finally, after the feelings of grieving, fears, anger and lowered self-esteem, we begin to worry and over-think. You may find yourself worrying about what will happen next, how you may be harmed, what may happen to others, or what else can go wrong. Or, you may find yourself replaying events of the past over and over again or replaying possible future events.

    These are the five emotions you experience in any stressful life situation and of course, very strongly in the loss of a loved one.

    If You Would Like to Share Your Thoughts.....

    After learning about the five emotions of a life challenge, I have found that many people like to think through and express how they are feeling these emotions. If you would like to do so, or find it helpful, feel free to fill out the form below.

    If you would like to share these feelings, I'd be glad to hear from you.

    Just fill in the form below and e-mail to stressresearch@tranquilities.com. I don't keep any personal information and strip the information from any e-mail address. You can copy and paste this part of the lesson and put your answers in.

    Stress Form

    Bob, Here's how I experienced the five emotions with my loss of a loved one.

    The person I lost was ______________________

    Currently, the grief and loss I am feeling is ____________ (examples: Shock, Overwhelming, Unable to even grasp it yet, my world has been taken from me, I feel totally empty inside, part of me is missing, Loss of companionship, Hope for the future is gone,etc. )

    The fear I am experiencing is ______________ (describe: Fears for the future, fears for my wellbeing, financial fears, fears of moving forward, fears of meeting relatives and friends since my loss, fears of my own death, fear of living, etc.)

    The kind of anger I am experiencing is _______________ (describe: anger at God that this happened, anger at the person for leaving me, anger at the disease or incident that took my loved one, angry at myself for some reason, turning it inward as guilt, feeling depressed, etc).

    This impacted my self-esteem in the following way: ____________________

    The created worry for me in the following way(s): ______________________

    Thanks for your feedback. I trust this was helpful to you in beginning to learn what you are feeling.

    The Path to Healing and Restoration

    Clearly, the path of healing and restoration may be lengthy, and the level of healing may vary, depending upon the impact of the loss to you. The loss of an elderly relative may be felt differently than a close friend, spouse or child. However, some degree of healing and restoration can occur, no matter how painful the loss.

    The Path to Healing and Restoration Begins with.....

    Cognitive Restructuring

    The path to healing begins when you realize that with God's help, and over time, you can learn what is called cognitive restructuring. Cognitive means the way you think and restructuring means to change or restructure your thought process.

    In the next five lessons you receive, we will discuss in detail, each of these five steps in your path of Healing and Restoration. Here's a brief overview of what you will learn.

    Step # 1 - Moving Towards Feeling Complete and Whole In Mind and Spirit.

    As difficult as it may seem now, over time, and with God's help, your mind and spirit can be restored and renewed and you can move towards feeling whole again.

    Step # 2 - Conquer Your Fear

    The loss of loved one may have created fears, including financial fears, fears of loneliness, or your or others well being. However, with God's help you can find the strength and courage to conquer your fears.

    Step # 3 - Release any Anger

    It's not unusual to have anger at the world, at God, perhaps even at the person who you lost or may have anger at yourself and experience guilt or depressing thoughts. We will teach you how you can release anger and forgive. We will discuss this in more detail in lesson # 4.

    Step # 4 - Learn You are Worthy and Value

    It is not unusual to feel a loss of self-worth and self-esteem when we lose those close to us. However, with God's help, you can rebuild and restore your sense of worth and value.

    Step # 5 - Learn to Be Peaceful and Calm

    Now finally, the last step is to learn how to release worry. When you learn this principle, when you feel worry or anxiety starting, you just do the simple exercise you will learn, and as you do this, worry and anxiety melts away.

    How Do You Learn These Five Principles?

    You may be thinking by now, how do I begin to learn and put these life changing principles into my life so I can begin to heal and restore

    For each of the five steps, there are three easy exercises that will permanently help you learn and put into place this new way of thinking, feeling and acting and put you on your path to healing and restoration. :

    • Exercise # 1 : Understand how the loss of your loved one is creating each emotion and feeling in you.
    • Exercise # 2 : Begin to think and imagine how you will feel and act differently when you have conquered and overcome the negative emotion
    • Exercise # 3 : Use guided imagery to release the negative emotion and replace it with a positive one

     

    Tranquilities Series

    I will explain in Lesson # 7 how the five CDs and five aromatherapy blends in Tranquilities for Persons Experiencing Grief combines guided imagery, your personal faith if desired, environmental sounds, music therapy and aromatherapy to help you learn these principles. If you would like to learn more about these CDs, please visit www.tranquilities.biz/grieving.cfm

    To purchase Tranquilities, click on one of these options.

    Click Here to Purchase With Secure Online Ordering
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    In your next lesson, we will discuss the feelings of grief and loss in more detail.

    For Your Healing and Restoration,

    Robert Miller ND

    To continue to your next lesson go to:

    Grieving Support Lesson 2